๐ผ๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ค๐๐’๐ก ๐๐๐๐ก ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ก๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ฆ๐๐ข, ๐ ๐๐ ๐ฆ๐๐ข, ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ก๐๐๐ ๐ค๐๐กโ ๐ฆ๐๐ข, ๐๐ก’๐ ๐ก๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ฆ๐๐ข ๐ก๐ ๐๐๐๐ก 5 ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ค๐๐ฃ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ฆ๐. – ๐ด๐๐๐๐ฆ๐๐๐ข๐
Have you ever thought about why we chase some or almost all the people in our lives? Simply put, it is because these people are running away from us. Sounds funny…right?
So think: why are they not with you? Why are they running away from you?
The answer is simple: it’s because something inside you bothers them. Something inside you makes them feel uncomfortable being with you. If the same person is settled or stuck with others, then why is it that with you, the person feels the need to be distant? These are the questions we must ask ourselves when we are desperate or forcing someone to stay in our lives.
In the past, when it came to friends in life or colleagues at the workplace, I used to chase them like an obsessed lover. I would do everything and anything to make them like and accept me. I was running on the belief that my friends must support me and my colleagues must favor me.
I mean, why? I mean, there was so much needy behavior inside me, desperate for them to ‘ support’ me.
The problem with this was that it created a fear inside me of ‘losing people’ and I started taking more wrong actions, like either actively chasing them or pushing myself into them, or inactively chasing them to like me by pushing them away or avoiding, hoping that one day they will accept me.
This is poor self-esteem and self-belief and reason for staying with people.
Trust me, nobody likes a person like that who is clinging onto them, so it is completely valid for one to run away or avoid.
The bottom line is that chasing people is self-humilating behavior. So it’s best to stop practicing it. More than the other person humiliating us, we humiliate ourselves by being needy or begging them to like, support, accept, or hold on to strong emotions like ‘love you’. The more we chase, the more we humiliate ourselves, and then we unconsciously develop a belief that ‘ I am worthless’ or ‘ I lack something in me’ and they have ‘what I want’. This is a self-destructive life practice.
Here is what one can choose to do instead:
๐๐ญ๐๐ซ๐ญ ๐๐ก๐๐ฌ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ๐ฌ๐๐ฅ๐. ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ .
When I say craft, I mean focusing and spending 100% of your time loving yourself first. Putting that chasing energy into crafting energy to feel better about yourself is a process to find out what you like about yourself and who are the people you stay with despite whoever you were the whole time. It is about spending time with yourself first. Loving and caring for yourself first.
When you focus on loving yourself, the real value of yourself, which is stored deep down in your personality, starts surfacing and you naturally start selecting people who share similar beliefs and choices. This is called natural selection. A process of letting people choose you because they love you for who you are and also for what you are not.
Our environment is a reflection of ourselves. What is inside is what is outside. That means that when you value and love yourself, people around you will value you. Until then, it will always be a struggle.
When you respect yourself, people will respect you too. And even if they don’t, that’s fine.
The best way to end the chase is by crafting self.
